Fair’s Fair in Love and Sailing
By Helen MacKenzie

I am, it has to be said, the sort of person who likes to stick to the rules: I get agitated if I cross the road before the Green Man is showing, and once threw a wobbly playing Snakes and Ladders with a bunch of four-year-olds – who absolutely insisted on going up the snakes and down the ladders.

Sailing Fantastic

Photo: Patrick Haney

So it came as no surprise to the Sailing Fanatic when, after informing me of his plans for the Scottish Series, I took a look at Rule Four of The Reluctant Sailor’s Ground Rules for Sailing. This provision – also known as the ‘Fair’s Fair’ rule – provides:

‘The Sailing Fanatic will match every week/weekend that the Reluctant Sailor spends sailing with a week/weekend somewhere warm, dry and comfortable – preferably abroad.’

But somehow, when faced with the prospect of numerous Sailing-Fanatic-free weekends – as he and his crew attempt to get in enough pre-race practice so that they at least look like they know what they are doing on a boat – Rule Four seems to be a little lacking. It makes no allowance for the aggravation of being left to entertain the kids/do all the boring stuff in the house for umpteen weekends in a row.

So, although it goes against all my rule-sticking principles, and purely for the benefit of Reluctant Sailors world-wide, I have amended Rule Four slightly. As from today Rule Four (A) adds:

‘The Sailing Fanatic will accept that it is a pain in the neck when he disappears for a day/weekend/week in preparation for and for the duration of any major sailing event and will compensate the Reluctant Sailor with a corresponding day/weekend/week somewhere warm, dry and comfortable – preferably abroad.’

In short, I insisted on a trip away.

But where did we go? What, you may well ask, could compare with a week of competitive sailing on the West coast of Scotland, in the company of friends, and assisted by good food, beer and hopefully (but not necessarily) sunshine?

The Sailing Fanatic suggested a trip overnight to Millport. Brave, but foolish words…

In the end we went to York. For a weekend. Without the kids.

Now I accept that this might not seem like a particularly good deal to all you other Reluctant Sailors out there, but when you bear in mind that we needed babysitters (thank you again!); the Sailing Fanatic is also a Workaholic; and (the clincher) the sailing season is almost upon us and no anti-fouling has yet been applied to the boat…. well, it looked like a pretty good deal to me.

York was cold, but lovely. Lots to see, lots to do and lots of pubs to sit in.

It was in one of these – the Cross Keys, next to the Minster – that the Sailing Fanatic let slip his plans for the future: Cowes; Cork Week; the Round Ireland Race; Antigua Week and sailing round the world. He seemed quite surprised when I raised no objections.

But I wasn’t thinking of sailing. I had my mind on Rule Four (A) and the sort of trip that could possibly compare to a Round the World yacht race.
I could go to Australia… and New Zealand… or how about Hong Kong… or even Moscow… or… hey! Why not do the whole lot!

Fair’s fair, after all…

Helen MacKenzie is a freelance writer. She contributes to the web site at http://www.sea-dreamer.com. The Sea Dreamer web site has articles, guides and news on sailing and cruising on the West Coast of Scotland.

The Best  Plans – Dreaming Of The Ideal Sailing Vacation
By Helen MacKenzie

If you thought that the build-up to Christmas seemed to last for months, then you won’t be pleased to hear that the build-up to the Summer Holidays has already begun.

Sailing Vacation

Photo: catchartering.com

Thick, glossy holiday brochures are thudding through the door so frequently that I hide whenever I hear the postman. Every time I pass the computer I see yet another blue-sky, blue-sea holiday website plastered on the screen and even the children I meet on the way to school are competing over who has the best holiday planned.

But while I daydream of holidays abroad, in a villa, with a pool, the Sailing Fanatic has something much more closer to home in mind.

‘How about a holiday on the boat?’ he suggested cheerily, about a week ago. ‘We could go through the Crinan Canal and island hop along the west coast!’

There was silence round the dinner table.

‘For two weeks? But I want to doooo something!’

‘Come on, Dad! It’s cold in Scotland!’

I let the kids do the talking for me; I knew there would be further battles ahead. I was right.

A few days later the Sailing Fanatic cornered us in the lounge.

‘Well, how about this then,’ he said, scattering a huge pile of paper onto the floor. ‘Sailing in the Med. It’s hot, it’s not in Scotland, the scenery’s beautiful and we could drift from beach to beach, island to island…’

He pulled a piece of paper from the pile. It was a print out of a website. ‘Sunsail!’ Another – ‘Sailing Holidays’. Another – ‘The Moorings.’

We could go on a flotilla holiday, he said, and team up with other boats to sail the Greek islands. It would be a wonderful adventure! Or we could simply charter a yacht by ourselves and head off into the wide, blue yonder. We could…

We couldn’t. We’re not. I simply can’t face spending two weeks cooped up on a boat with two active children, no matter how many beaches and islands we stop at. I said so.

The Sailing Fanatic smiled craftily.

‘Well, what about this instead,’ he said, whipping out yet another print out from the paper mountain. It had ‘Mark Werner’ emblazoned across the top. ‘A sailing activity holiday. Abroad. On the beach. Living on land, with lots of facilities and things for the kids to do.’

I had to admit it had the edge over being stuck on a yacht for two weeks. But I had been doing some research of my own.

‘If you want a sailing holiday, then take a look at this!’ I flourished my own website print out, complete with a picture of a ship – a rather large ship from Royal Caribbean called ‘The Adventure of the Seas.’

‘It’s got an ice-skating rink, a climbing wall, kids club, swimming pools, talent show, restaurants…’

The Sailing Fanatic was not impressed.

‘I rather think you’re missing the point,’ he said, loftily.

But then the kids grabbed the print out.

‘Cool!’ they exclaimed. ‘Can we go sailing on that boat?’

Helen MacKenzie is a freelance writer. She contributes to the web site at http://www.sea-dreamer.com. The Sea Dreamer web site has articles, guides and news on sailing and cruising on the West Coast of Scotland.